Hilary Glaus, "The Health-usiast"

Do you ever say I wish I was that kind of person in reference to someone whose qualities you admire and you feel as if you just don’t measure up? Here’s the good news: you can, and you do! It’s just a matter of changing your perspective, because the qualities you admire in others are the ones that you too possess...otherwise you wouldn’t be attracted to them! You may not feel like you’re capable.... You may feel inadequate. You may be stuck in a pattern of compare and despair, and it feels as if everyone else has it figured out except you. But here’s the thing: comparing requires you to observe and see things that others have that you want. Instead of despairing, you can transform that energy into something much more positive! Because of someone else has it, it means it’s possible for you to possess it, too! So next time you feel yourself despairing, turn it around! Ask yourself: what simple action step can I take right now to nurture this quality within myself?!

I used to care more about about trying to make other people like ME than whether or not I liked THEM. It’s true! I used to think that the worst feeling in the world was someone not liking me, but now I know better... The worst feeling in the world isn’t being disliked (which in most scenarios wasn’t even the case, so I was worried about absolutely nothing!), but rather putting someone’s opinion of you above your own opinion of you.... I’ve learned that people are pretty much into themselves: they’re not worrying about what you’re doing (or not doing), and usually not spending much of their time disliking you! And those who are and want you to know about it have their own s**t going on! What they think of you is a reflection of them, and has nothing to do with you. This is not a criticism of others but rather a call to action! The more time you spend focused on you; what you’re about; what lights you up; and what brings you pleasure and satisfaction, the less time you’ll have to worry about others’ opinions of you. You’ll also naturally give others more of the benefit of the doubt when they say something salty or do something to try and provoke a reaction. You’ll be more likely to see their behavior as what it is: something reflective of them and what they’re going through as opposed to a condemnation or criticism of you.

What’re you into? What do you love talking about for hours? What topics are you Googling? What blogs do you follow? Whose emails do you open religiously? What conclusions might someone draw about you if they saw your five most-recent Amazon purchases?! If someone were to audit my most recent Amazon purchases, I think they would conclude that I am 1fascinated by human sexual behavior and alternatives to traditional monogamy; 2a metaphysics junkie and wildly curious about... the power of the mind to attract your deepest desires; 3utterly obsessed with protein-packed nut butter! So tell me! What did you order most-recently from Amazon and what do you think that purchase says about you and what YOU’RE into?!?

It is literally impossible to have a healthy self esteem when you don’t know what you want or even who you are because your identity is wrapped up in others... And when you don’t know what you truly desire and who you really are, you settle for a whole lot less than you deserve and you think it’s ok. You justify it, because it easier to do that than admit that you abandoned yourself.... But the good news is that it’s never too late for self rediscovery! It’s never too late to reconnect with that spunky, fearless little girl who was unapologetically herself and knew without a shadow of a doubt who she is and what she wants. So just how can you begin to get back in touch with her? Talk to your friends and family and ask them about what you were like when you we’re younger and what you loved. It might jog some memories! Ask yourself: what do I love to talk about? What do I love so much that I’d do it for free? If you’re not currently incorporating that activity into your life, find a way to make it happen in some way, shape, or fashioneven if it’s just a hobby!